Prom photos

Here's some photos. (:

anxiety

Prom is Saturday. I am freaking out. I'm legitimately doing the whole "prom" thing. To be honest, I only hoped, but didn't actually think, I would be when it came to this time. It's the sad truth and I am still in disbelief that all these ducks have lined up in a little row. I got my surgery and have a rockin' bod for my gorgeous dress, got asked by a great guy/friend, get to be "treated" (aka he pays), and dance/party it up with all my best friends my senior year. I am stoked.

The plan, as far as I know ('cause they're still figuring things out -- haha), is to go on a "super date" that includes mini-golfing, Jump Street, which is a huge warehouse with 16,000 square feet of trampoline lining the floor and walls, and then pictures, dinner in Scottsdale, and the dance at Falcon Fields Air Force Museum. Yeah? I think so.

You can bet that I will be posting pictures & lots of 'em. (:

What's Eating Alex Colby

The title of this post is in lieu of my fondness for the film What's Eating Gilbert Grape, which I made Cassie watch this afternoon. (:

Since we're on the subject of what's eating me, I'll just start rambling. The good and bad.

For starters, I got asked to prom!!! I was certain that I wouldn't be asked, but I was. And now I'm happy. The end. Hahah, just kidding. The guy who asked me is my good buddy, Zach. I was surprised because I was unaware he had split with his girlfriend. It was a welcome surprise, none-the-less. I found my dress (which has quite the story to go along with it) and my shoes. I'm all set. Our prom theme is Soar Above the Sky, a 1940s/WWII sort of thing. It's being held inside of an airplane hangar at an AirForce museum somewhere in Mesa. I'm excited! Finger waves! :D

Alright, something else. I don't understand why some guys just love to play games. They play "stupid", "I DGAFrick", etc. One of my last relationships didn't quite end clearly and he keeps coming in and out of the picture. Frustrates me to no end. He doesn't make the effort to talk to me, see how I'm doing, etc. unless he needs something in return. No, I don't want to be the one to initiate our convos because I am the girl and I am awesome at making myself look clingy and am, therefore, avoiding being the initiator.

My compression garment is eating me. It sucks to be strapped into all this post-op garb, but eh. I suppose I can't complain because I am happy with what I am seeing so far. I am fantastically colored with bruises from yellow to black and everything in between. Swollen, too. It's grand. Four and a half more weeks til I can take this sucker off. Hallelujah.

I'm getting sleepy now. I think I ought to go to bed.

daddy's little girl.

Late in the afternoon, I had finished watching Mr. & Mrs. Smith when I got up to use the bathroom. I discovered it was "that time". I took off my clothes and compression garment and decided to throw a load of clothes into the wash with them while I showered. Wrapped in a towel, I put all the clothes into the machine. My ears began to ring, vision became blurry, and I became lightheaded. I yelled for Brig to get me my soda and some crackers as I sat on the floor in the laundry room. This had happened a couple times the first day of surgery, so I figured it would pass as it had before.

I got up and the wooziness wouldn't go away and I became sick to my stomach. Then the cramps kicked in. I walked into my own bathroom and sat on the toilet. Nothing helped. I layed on the rug in front of my shower just waiting for it all to leave. I had grabbed my phone in case I came near to passing out.
Feeling it was close by, I called my mom and began to cry in despair as I told her what was going on. She called my dad who happened to be pulling in the driveway. I heard my dad enter my room and knock on the bathroom door, "Alex?" I called him in, still crying. "Honey, it's okay. It's okay. Shh, shh." as he covered me with more towels and propped my feet up on the toilet. I felt terribly embarassed, being 18, wrapped in a towel, shower running, lying on the floor in horrible girl pain. I covered my face with my hands and cried. He knelt next to me and ran his hand over my hair to calm me down. "It's okay. You just went into a little shock," he explained, "all the blood rushed away from your brain. Your brain couldn't get oxygen; that's why you were going to pass out. But it's okay now, you don't need to cry." My dad gently pulled my hands away from my face and wiped off my tears. "It's okay."

In all my life, I can only recall a handful of moments like this between me and my dad. As stupid and ridiculous as I felt lying on the floor with terrible cramps, near fainting, and hideously bruised from surgery, I knew my dad loved me. No matter what I do, how perfect or not, he will always love me and be there for me. Though the way in which I learned today was not at all pleasant, I would go through hell and back to know my dad would be there for me.

swollen

Sorry if you get easily grossed out. But surgery's not pretty. (:

April 1st -- surgery went smoothly. I don't think I'm afraid of being nude in front of doctors anymore, or my mom. At least she can vouch that she saw the "before" and that it was money well spent. Anesthesia is an experience in and of itself. The nurse and anesthetist asked me, "So, where you going to go on vacation in a minute?" I managed to slur out, "Georgia...to visit...my..aunt.." and was gone. Next thing I know, I am waking up and disoriented. I can feel my body being shoved around as the nurses applied my gauze and strapped me into my compression garment. "We're all done, Alex." Huh??? It felt like no time had passed. My mom walked in from behind the curtain and then I realized I was finished. The big event had come and gone in no time.

On our way home, Mom had to drop a couple things off at the salon. Everyone inside knew that I was having my procedures done and they all came out to see me in my post-op glory. It was a cute moment. The rest of the day, I stayed knocked out on my medications and only got up to use the restroom. Man, I have never realized what a huge ordeal it was to be able to pee. Seriously. I had to talk my body into relaxing every time I walked into the bathroom. Sleep came relatively easy to me; Mom slept by my side the first night to help me do everything. Literally everything. I couldn't sit up, roll over, stand, scoot, nothing. The incisions from surgery were a mess to keep up after, too. Constantly leaking fluid. I'm super thankful for her willingness to help me. I kept apologizing for asking for help every two seconds. She's the best mom.

April 2nd -- had my post-op exam. The doc had me remove my compression garment and all the gauze and padding all over my body. My legs were covered in splotches of blue, purple, and black. Swollen everywhere. I could see the beginnings of my new legs shape. Hooray! My doctor said I was moving around pretty well for it having only been 24 hours. At home, I walked around to keep circulation going in my legs but getting up is a pain. I enjoyed the few hours of napping I was allowed. My instructions were to stay awake as much as possible.

Today has definitely been the best so far, naturally. I can tell that I'm super bloated and swollen still, but the drainage has decreased to almost nothing -- just one little sucker on the back of my calf is still on/off (gross! ;P ) I got to shower finally, another hooray(!), which felt amazing. Cassie came and visited me. I told her all the gross and embarassing details, which she stomached as best as a Cassie champ could. Hahahah. I'm wrapped up from top to toes in my compression garment and trying to keep my legs elevated at every chance possible. My calves will take the longest to heal as gravity and walking force everything downward. I'm off my narcotic, which means I can drive. I was worried that I'd have a glimpse at why people become addicted to narcotics like hydrocodone and vicodin. Fortunately, it just curbed the pain, nothing more. 

Now that I've documented the biggest event thus far in my life, I will go back to chilling in front of the TV. Comment if you wish. (: